Looking Ahead to 2021

Happy New Year!

2020 has definitely been one heck of a ride. At this time last year, I sat here making plans for expanding RiverEvolutions, for services and workshops I wanted to offer and for how to bring more visibility to what I do.

And then there was a pandemic.

Instead of being a year of attracting more clients, 2020 was a year of attracting fewer. But it was also a year of taking better care of myself and of doing some serious inner work on my “shadows.” It’s been a beneficial year in a number of ways for me, even if it hasn’t been the year I’d hoped.

I’m cautious about planning for 2021, because I understand more than ever how quickly and vastly things can change. But I do have some things in store.

I’m still offering energy healing sessions, channeling sessions, and my most recent addition, oracle card readings. These services are open to anyone who is interested, but my heart is in working with those who have experienced abuse and trauma and are working to embrace their inner power to create their best lives. The tools and services I offer are those that have helped me in my own healing journey from abuse and trauma and in claiming my own power, and I am excited to offer them to others.

Any time I’ve done sessions with others, mindset coaching becomes part of it. Mindset coaching is gentle guidance and encouragement in recognizing the thought and behavior patterns that hold you back from creating your best life, and identifying ways to counter and break those patterns. This will also continue in 2021, and will be explicitly included. It isn’t a separate service and doesn’t include a separate cost; it’s part of whichever service you choose to have with me. And it is optional; if you aren’t interested in any discussion or coaching around mindset blocks, we can leave it out.

All sessions until further notice are done on Zoom or Facebook video messenger. Zoom is my current preference because of the ability to record the sessions for the client’s future reference, but I have to admit I find Facebook video a bit easier technologically. So it’s up to the client which they prefer. I won’t be offering in-person sessions until I feel confident in doing so without risk to my clients’ health or my own. (Channeling and oracle card readings are also available by email.)

I am not currently planning to offer any classes, workshops, or instruction in 2021. I thought long and hard about this one, because I know a number of practitioners reach potential clients and give added benefit through classes and workshops. For myself, I feel that I need to get a better handle on *how* I want to teach and then determine *what* I want to teach, so I’ll be working on that throughout 2021 and plan to resume offering Chios instruction, as well as other classes and workshops, in 2022. By which time hopefully I’ll be able to offer some in person!

I will be putting together resources for learning, though. Over the past few months, several people have asked, either in Facebook groups or directly to me, about connecting with their guides and learning to channel. That’s one thing about which I feel very called to create resources such as ebooks and videos, so I will be working on that and introducing the resources as they’re ready. That isn’t the only thing I’ll be creating, but it’s the most prominent in my mind right now.

Speaking of channeling, in May I will be releasing the first Messages from Shiva book, in digital form and hopefully print. This is a compilation of the daily channeled messages I share on Facebook, with some additional content and arranged by topic and theme. It’s my hope that this book will bring guidance and encouragement to those who purchase it. I’ll be sharing more info and some giveaways as the release gets closer!

I am continuing my inner work as well, and utilizing resources on trauma-informed coaching and other services so I can offer the most beneficial experiences to my clients.

It’s my hope to offer support and guidance to people navigating their way into the coming year and into their best lives. May 2021 bring us closer to the lives we desire and deserve!

How I Do Oracle Card Readings

Oracle card readings, using my exclusive Seascapes Oracle deck, are one of the tools I offer to clients who are seeking to create and evolve into their best lives. These readings provide guidance and insight about the client’s life, or about specific issues or questions they have.

A number of practitioners offer oracle readings, and there are a number of ways to do a reading. I wanted to share how I do mine.

Right now, real-time readings are only done over Zoom. If you don’t have Zoom, that’s no problem! As long as you have a computer or phone with video and a microphone, we’re good. I set up Zoom on my end and send you the link; at the time of our meeting, you click the link and you and I will be in a “room” where we can see and speak to each other. I can help with minor troubleshooting, or if you aren’t sure of the controls for things like your camera and microphone.

I’ve chosen to do the readings in Zoom because doing so gives me the option to record, and I want to be able to record the reading to send to the client for their reference. So you aren’t only getting half an hour of my time, you’re getting a recorded session to which you’ll be able to refer back as often as you’d like. However, if Zoom isn’t something you prefer to work with, I can also do the readings on Facebook video chat; this doesn’t allow for recording, but is easier to work with.

You’ll have chosen, at the time of scheduling and paying for your session, whether you want a 3-card reading or a 6-card. I recommend 3-card readings if you have a specific question; if you want general guidance, either a 3-card or a 6-card would be appropriate, though you would receive more information in a 6-card reading.

Once we’ve introduced ourselves and talked a little about why you’re having the reading, I pull the cards. I do this through energy; moving my hand over the deck, I feel “pulled” to certain cards. I have found that the first card I draw is usually the one the client needs to hear the most, though it may not be the one that most directly answers the question. 

I show you each card and read the message on it, and then expand on that message. My readings are mostly intuitive; while the messages on the cards are relevant, my intuition and my guides are what show me *how* they are relevant. The expansion includes how the card relates to your question or life, how it relates to the other cards in the reading, and what it might be suggesting in terms of next steps for your life or in the situation you’ve asked about.

After all of the cards have been read, you have time to ask questions for clarification or further expansion on the reading. During this time, I’ve found that some mindset coaching often happens, because thought and behavior patterns come to light that might be holding the client back. While I don’t offer coaching as a separate service, it tends to play a role in all of the services I offer; creating your best life includes recognizing what’s been holding you back from doing so.

After the reading is over, I’ll send you the link for the Zoom recording if we’ve done it on Zoom. For one week afterward, I’m available to you by email or Messenger to answer any additional questions or provide more clarification about the reading. (If you use Messenger to contact me, it won’t be a real-time conversation; it will be similar to emailing back and forth.) 

I also do email readings, which are three cards only. For an email reading, once I’ve received your question or request for a general reading, I pull the cards and send you an email that includes thumbnail images of each card, the cards’ messages, and a brief expansion as I do in a real-time reading. Email readings don’t include the discussion period afterward, and the expansion may not be as full as in a real-time reading, but you still have the one-week option to contact me for further clarification about the reading.

I would love to do a reading for you! Readings are by appointment. To schedule, Contact Us or visit the Readings page for more information. You have the option on that page to purchase a reading and have me contact you for scheduling.

Some Benefits of Chios Energy Healing

Since 2005, when I was first introduced to Chios Energy Healing, I’ve seen a lot of benefits from it, both as a recipient and as a practitioner. I’m not going to go into a lot of detail in this post, because I need to be mindful of the confidentiality of my past clients, but a few things that I can say:

I’ve found that Chios has helped unlock memories of my past. While the memories themselves aren’t always positive, having them has been invaluable in helping me recover from past traumas and progress in my healing journey. You can’t address what you don’t know is there.

I’ve worked with clients who lived with chronic pain who, after a Chios session, experienced a decrease in their pain level for a few days or even a few weeks. Again, Chios isn’t a medical treatment, but what affects your energy can affect you physically and emotionally.

I’ve worked with clients who were experiencing a great deal of stress, which was affecting them physically as well as mentally and emotionally. After a session of Chios, some of these clients had less stress, and their overall well-being improved for a period of time.

Almost all of my clients have said they gained clarity and mental focus after sessions.

If nothing else, when you experience a Chios Energy Healing session, you relax. For the main part of the session, whether you’re having it in person or by distance, you’re lying down to rest. That alone can have a profoundly positive effect on your well-being.

On October 24, I received my certification as Chios Master of Healing Consciousness. I’m so excited to have attained this level in the Chios modality, and I’m thrilled about being able to offer this even more powerful level of healing to my clients! The CMHC techniques allow me to provide a more intense and beneficial level of healing energy, which in turn facilitates greater healing and well-being for the people with whom I work.

On November 2, I’ll resume offering Chios Energy Healing sessions. For the time being, I am only doing these sessions by distance, since my goal is to facilitate health and healing, not take risks with physical health. In a distance session, I meet with the client via video chat (Zoom or Facebook video messenger, generally) for a short consultation, and then for about half an hour I do Chios techniques for the client while they lie down and rest. We aren’t on video during this part of the session. When I’ve completed the techniques, I contact the client again via video chat so we can discuss what I noticed and what they may have experienced during the healing work.

If you’re curious to find out more about Chios Energy Healing, or to schedule a session, please Contact Us or visit the Chios Energy Healing page.

Why I Chose Chios

In 2005, I was struggling. My marriage was toxic and at times abusive. I felt completely incompetent as a mother. I’d discovered I couldn’t fit into the box of public education, so my career as a special education teacher had come to an end.

Most importantly, and most impactful, I’d begun recovering memories of abuse and trauma I’d experienced as a child. Those things had never fully been forgotten, but I’d stuffed them into a strongbox at the back of my mind, and tried to pretend they didn’t exist so I could function on a daily basis. But now they were finding their way out of the box, and I didn’t know how to deal with them.

That year, I met someone who became a close friend and mentor. During one of our conversations, he told me he did a type of energy healing called Chios, and offered me a session. I figured it wouldn’t hurt, so I accepted.

The difference was immediate and profound, though definitely not pleasant. The mental strongbox opened, and a lot of things came out, some of which I’d known were there and some I hadn’t been consciously aware of. It was difficult, and I’ll always be thankful to my friend for his support and willingness to listen and help me process in the immediate aftermath of that session.

However, even though it wasn’t easy to deal with, the session was incredibly beneficial. Having the clarity of what had happened to me enabled me to deal with the events, and to work on my personality traits and behaviors that had developed as a result. I also became clearer on what I wanted my life to look like, and on the fact that I did deserve to live a healthy, happy, safe life.

The effects that Chios had on me and for me were amazing, and I knew after that first session that I wanted to learn the techniques so I could help others. My friend saw me as a natural healer and agreed to teach me. Within a few months, I worked my way through the Chios levels to attain the certification of Chios Master Teacher.

Chios won’t work for everyone. For some people, it simply doesn’t resonate, or it isn’t as effective as other modalities. For me personally, it’s the only modality that has ever fully resonated, which is why it’s the only one I practice. I have tried learning a couple of other modalities, but the information I studied literally would not stay in my brain for more than a few minutes, which showed me clearly that those modalities were not meant for me.

The reason so many modalities of healing exist is because nothing works for everyone, but everything works for someone. I have had clients and students come to me who have explored several other modalities and found, as I did, that Chios was the one that actually resonated. I recommend Chios to anyone who has found other modalities to be ineffective for them or for whom other modalities don’t resonate.

Beginning November 2, I’ll resume offering Chios distance sessions. A distance session lasts about an hour total, and includes discussion with me over video chat both before and after the healing work. During the healing work, all you need to do is lie down (or sit, if lying down isn’t an option) quietly for about half an hour, while I do the energy work for you. If this is something you’re interested in or curious about, please visit the Chios Energy Healing page on this site, or feel free to Contact Us!

I’m not currently accepting Chios students, but hope to resume giving instruction in Chios in early 2021. If you’d like to be kept informed about that, let me know!

Studying

I love to learn things. Learning has always been something I enjoyed, though only under certain circumstances. Most of the “learning” we were required to do in school didn’t appeal to me, because it seemed arbitrary and I was only learning those things because someone else told me to. But learning things on my own, following my own interests and intuition, always appealed.

Partly for my own benefit and partly because I want to build and grow the skills and knowledge I use in RiverEvolutions, I’m currently starting a time of learning and growth in various areas. Some of my blog posts over the coming weeks and months will be about what I’m learning.

I’m enrolled in the Ph.D. program through the University of Metaphysical Sciences. This course is giving me the opportunity to broaden my knowledge base, as well as to narrow in on skills I can use as a healer, channel, and coach. It’s going to take time; regardless of what degrees one already has, UMS requires you to start with their Bachelor’s program and work up. But I’m excited about gaining this knowledge.

On my own, I’m studying Tarot and oracle cards, because I intend to offer readings of both types through RiverEvolutions over the next few months. But obviously if I’m going to do readings, I need to build my knowledge and skills! I’ve found a number of books and video resources, and if you know of any, I would love to hear about them.

I’m also reading more about trauma and its effects. I know many effects that trauma can have; I’ve lived with them. However, I want to have a more objective understanding of trauma, particularly as it relates to mindfulness practices and meditation. I’ve found for myself that some types of meditation actually have adverse effects; rather than feeling still and calm, I feel angry and revved up, and it can take a full day for me to settle again. At first when this happened, I thought I was doing something wrong, but then I saw friends of mine who also have lived through abuse or trauma say they had similar experiences when attempting to meditate. I’m setting out to study why that happens and find or create mindfulness practices that take those effects into account.

I’m building my knowledge base about Witchcraft. I am a Witch (not a Wiccan, though), but that doesn’t mean I know a lot. Magic and Witchcraft are very, very broad topics with a lot to learn and read, and I’m poking around finding things that call to me to learn more about. 

And I’m taking a course to attain the next level in Chios Energy Healing! I’m so excited about this one, because it will enable me to offer even more effective and beneficial energy healing services to my client, and because I’m learning directly from the developer of Chios, Stephen Barrett. Stay tuned for more about this, because you’d better believe I’ll be celebrating when I attain this degree. This is especially relevant now, as I gear up to resume offering Chios Energy Healing sessions beginning November 2.

Those aren’t all the things I’ll be learning and studying over the coming months. I’m kind of excited about this, because as I said, I love learning new things and refreshing or building on my knowledge of things I’ve learned previously. In some blogs, I’ll share things I’m learning.

“Create Your Best Life”

“Create and evolve into your best life” is the tagline for RiverEvolutions, but some people aren’t clear on what I mean by it. So I wanted to take a moment to explain.

I believe all of us have the innate power to bring things into our lives, change our lives, and create what we want to live. This isn’t some magical thing, though some people might call it magic; it’s a power we have purely by virtue of being alive.

As children, a lot of us play games of “make-believe” or talk about what we want to be when we grow up. We don’t recognize limits on our creative power. We believe in magic, we believe we can be whatever we want to be, and we create those things in our minds. And sometimes, those childhood “imaginings” and creations carry over into adulthood.

But sometimes we lose touch with that creative power. It might happen because adults tell us to stop playing “silly” games and make-believe. Sometimes, it happens because our power is taken away through abuse and trauma. We learn that life is a thing that happens to us, and we have to take what we get.

That’s a mindset I was in for a long time, and the events in my life didn’t do anything to change that mindset. But finally, I started realizing that I do have power in my own life. I can make things happen instead of sitting back and waiting. 

What I want in my life is what I can have, if I am focused and believe I’m deserving of having the things I want. If my life isn’t working out the way I want it to, that doesn’t mean I don’t deserve good things; it means I need to examine where I’m not using my creative power, and make changes in those areas.

When I talk about creating your best life, I’m talking about reclaiming your power and using it to make things happen in your life. And evolving? That means learning to *accept* your creative power, learning how to use it, and pushing beyond the fears and “what ifs” to actually put things into place so you can live the life you truly want to live.

Basically, I believe everyone deserves to live a life where they feel fulfilled and happy. Learning to create that kind of life is a journey, one I’m still on myself. But tools like energy healing and channeling have helped me recognize, reclaim, and use my creative power, and that’s what I love to do for others using those tools. For me, part of creating and evolving into *my* best life means helping other people create and evolve into theirs.

I’ve Been Recovering…

It’s been two weeks since I underwent throat surgery to remove my thyroid due to growths and an autoimmune disorder. 

The whole situation was a perfect example of why, when you know something is wrong with your body, you need to push your doctors until they listen to you. I had been saying for two years that something was wrong with my thyroid, but even though I’m fortunate to have doctors who usually agree that I know my body better than they do, they didn’t do the tests that would have revealed the actual issues. They tested my thyroid function, which was in the normal range, but didn’t do the antibody test that would have identified the autoimmune disorder, and didn’t actually touch my neck or throat, which would have shown them the lumps that were developing

I’m thankful that the issues were found when they were, at the beginning of this summer. Actually, in a strange way, I’m thankful for COVID; if COVID didn’t exist, when I developed symptoms at the beginning of June, I might not have gone to the doctor who found the lumps in my neck and finally got the ball rolling for me to have correct diagnoses and the surgery. (I didn’t have COVID; my symptoms were the direct result of the issues with my thyroid.)

So now I’ve been recovering for two weeks, and I’m feeling almost back to “normal.” I’m able to get up and do things. My voice is recovering. And I am ready to start working with clients again.

I have already resumed accepting clients for virtual channeling sessions on Zoom or Facebook video messenger, as well as accepting requests for email channelings. I’ve spent the time leading up to my surgery, and during part of my recovery, honing my channeling skills and my presentation to clients, and I’m looking forward to the relaunch!

If you’re interested in having a channeling session or requesting an email channeling, please visit the Channeling page of this website or feel free to email me at river@riverevolutions.com. I look forward to working with you!

Healing Doesn’t Always Mean Forgiving

Note: This is a slightly revised version of my post which originally appeared on the Wellness Universe blog on August 2, 2020. 

My marriage to my children’s father included a great deal of emotional and verbal abuse from him, along with behavior that can only be labeled toxic. That behavior and abuse continued off and on even after I ended the marriage, until last year when I finally severed all possible means he had of reaching me. He has caused lasting emotional damage for me, with the result that I have been in therapy for over a decade to work on healing from what he did as well as from other abuses I’ve experienced in my life.

In some corners of the spiritual community, I would be told to forgive him. I might even be told that forgiving him is the only way I could “truly” heal.

I disagree.

My spiritual mentor taught me that when it comes to harm caused by others, forgiveness equates to admitting that person has power over you. My mentor’s advice was, instead, to practice acceptance. “I accept that this occurred in my life, and that it was the choice of the person who caused the damage to do so. I accept that it was not about me, but about them. I accept that I am a good person regardless and can move on with my life.”

Forgiveness, as preached and practiced by some, not only involves acknowledging someone’s role and power in your life, but also often includes allowing that person to remain in your life. Again, according to those who espouse this way of thinking, the only way to be genuinely healed is to continue to allow the person who wounded you to be around you, even at the risk of being wounded again.

And again, I disagree.

In my view, someone’s first priority is to take care of themselves. To practice self-care, self-love, and self-acceptance. Sometimes, this means removing other people from your life. I had little choice about allowing my kids’ father to remain in my life; we shared children, and the court refused to believe what I told them about his abuse, so I was legally compelled to coparent with him. That exposure to him and his abuse did an additional near-decade of emotional and mental harm to me, until my children were old enough that I was no longer under that legal obligation. And the moment that became the case, I cut that tie.

Allowing someone toxic or abusive to remain in your life in the name of “forgiveness” doesn’t serve you or bring any benefit to anyone except the toxic/abusive person, who continues to have an unobstructed license to continue their behavior. This is not “true healing.” This is ego speaking, telling you that you have to act in a “more spiritual” way to prove that you’re really healed and enlightened. (An exception might be made for someone who has been toxic or abusive in the past but has demonstrated remorse, willingness and ability to change, and has expressed apology and made amends for their behavior.)

True healing comes when you embrace yourself as the incredible being you were created as, and choose to conduct your life and relationships in a way that honors yourself, your needs, and your health. And sometimes that means forgiveness doesn’t happen, at least not as it’s often preached–and that is okay. You have the right to set boundaries for yourself. You have the right to say, “This person is unhealthy for me.” And you have the right to forgive–or accept–in the way that works best for you.

I work with people who have experienced abuse, bullying, and trauma and are learning to forgive and accept themselves above all, providing Chios Energy Healing, channeling, and mindset coaching to facilitate their healing journey. I would love to talk with anyone who is on that journey about how I might help. Channeling sessions, which have been on hold due to my recent surgery, will resume on Monday; Chios Energy Healing sessions are unavailable until November 2, but I can share some suggestions for ways to rebalance and restore your own energy system. You can learn more on my website, http://www.riverevolutions.com, or my Facebook page, http://www.facebook.com/riverevolutions.

My Voice

As a child, I was taught not to use my voice, especially when it came to speaking about the things I knew to be true. My mother became easily overwhelmed when I talked “too much” (meaning, talked the way a young child typically would), and my father was horrified and upset if I talked about magic, having invisible friends, trees talking to me, or any of the other things that made up my world at the time. My father and other adults also told me not to talk unless I had something important to say, with the implication–and sometimes explicit statement–that nothing I had to say would ever be important.

Whether it was because of how adults treated me or something I would have experienced anyway, I also have always had a great deal of difficulty with expressive language. The ideas are there, in my brain, but sometimes the words to express them aren’t. And even when the words are there, sometimes I’m too afraid to speak because of what others might say or do. Anxiety about saying the wrong thing, about being accused of lying or having someone misunderstand me and get angry with me because of it, has been a constant in my life.

I also have difficulty comprehending what others say; sounds get into my ears just fine, but the words sometimes get jumbled or translated into gibberish as they reach my brain. This only adds to my difficulties with speaking and my anxiety about conversations.

As an adult, I lived for about fourteen years in a situation where speaking my truth was literally unsafe. I learned to be quiet no matter what was going on. It wasn’t what I wanted to do, but self-preservation took over.

Now I’m in a safe situation, but with some people who don’t understand or don’t believe in the magic, energy, and other things I’ve rediscovered from my childhood. My entire business is based around those things, but I can’t talk about them to my husband or some other people in my life. They won’t harm me, but their eye-rolling and disrespect aren’t much better.

For many years, I’ve learned not to speak my truth, not to speak up for my needs, not to express my wants and dreams. Even as I started learning about energy, and knew that choosing to be silent would have negative effects on my throat chakra, which could lead to negative effects on my overall health and wellbeing, I was still too afraid to speak. I did energy work on my throat chakra, but didn’t carry that through to speaking up about what I believe in, my gifts and skills, and even who I truly am.

Now, in a couple of weeks, I will be having surgery to remove my thyroid. My immune system has been attacking a gland that resides in my throat, and on top of that there are growths on the thyroid. I had a biopsy that came back with no results due to an issue with the sample; I’ve since had a second biopsy that revealed abnormal cells, and we’re waiting for additional results to determine whether it’s cancer. These issues, and others I’ve experienced due to the deterioration of my thyroid, should be fully resolved by the surgery. But the surgery itself carries the risk of damaging my vocal cords. I could literally, and permanently, lose my voice.

I’m thinking about the positives. The risks are small and unlikely. However, I’m also thinking of how I got here. The fact that my constant and consistent refusal to use my voice has led me to a point where losing it is a possibility. The fact that this condition has been present for at least two years, worsening all that time as I continued not to speak even when I knew there was something wrong in my throat.

I’m learning to speak up now. It’s too late to correct what I’m facing, but I can correct the energies and the habits.

Speak your truth whenever and wherever it’s safe to do so. Use your voice. Avoid my choices, and make the ones that will most benefit you when it comes to speaking up.

Emotions Aren’t Bad

We’re taught that certain emotions are “bad” or wrong. We aren’t supposed to feel them. We’re supposed to suppress them and act like they don’t exist.

The top among these is anger. Especially if you’re a girl, or raised/socialized as one, you’re told to be quiet and “ladylike” and sweet. If you show anger, you’re bad.

This can be common in the spiritual practice world as well. If you’re truly spiritual, so the story goes, you don’t feel anger. You just accept and forgive everyone and everything and feel nothing negative at all ever, because if you do, you aren’t really spiritual.

Bullshit.

Anger, jealousy, fear…all the emotions that some people designate as “bad” are HUMAN emotions. If you’re a human being, odds are good that you feel emotions. Feeling anger is no more “bad” than feeling joy. Emotions are not good or bad; they just are. And trying to force yourself not to feel them often results in just stuffing the emotion down into a little box in your mind—a box that might burst somewhere down the line.

The key isn’t to stop *feeling* emotions. It’s to learn healthy and productive ways to *express* them.

Ultimately, we are each responsible for our own emotions and how we display them. Emotions are neither good nor bad; actions can be, but taking a negative action does not automatically make someone a bad person. 

Feeling emotions is NORMAL. Even emotions we’ve been taught are wrong or bad. Trying to suppress or ignore those emotions can be harmful to us and can lead to them coming up in less manageable ways down the road.

We also dishonor ourselves when we deny our emotions. Many of us who have experienced abuse and trauma have a child self living within our minds, a part of ourselves that became frozen at a time of trauma. In DBT (dialectical behavioral therapy, a technique often used in treating borderline personality disorder and PTSD among other things), that part of us is referred to as the “emotional mind.” In some forms of Witchcraft, it’s Younger Self. Whatever you call it, it’s a part of us, and it’s part of our healing journey to accept, nurture, and work with it. If we’re telling ourselves, “I can’t feel angry, it’s bad, I’m a bad person for feeling this way,” we’re continuing the abuse that damaged us in the first place. We’re taking the words and concepts forced on us by others and internalizing them, and that continues the damage.

Instead, I’ve found it’s far more productive to feel the emotion. To say, “I feel really angry, and that’s okay; how can I deal with this?” Even to express fear of feeling the anger, if that’s present for you. Some coping strategies for anxiety and PTSD can be used for anger as well.

Allowing yourself to feel those emotions and express them in *healthy* ways can help lessen them, and honors you as the awesome human you are.

You aren’t bad if you feel anger. You aren’t “not truly spiritual.” You are human, and you have the right to feel however you feel. You don’t have the right to express those feelings in harmful ways, but you one hundred percent have the right to feel them, and to express them in nonharmful ways. (And if you do express anger or another emotion in a way that’s harmful, that still doesn’t make you a bad person. It still just makes you human. Make apologies, make amends, and get help with learning more effective management strategies if it’s an ongoing problem… but accept yourself as a good person who just needs help to learn better responses to your emotions.)

As a final note, if you’re a parent, please teach your children that emotions are always okay to feel, and teach them healthy, productive ways to express them. Show them that they, too, are good people, and that you love them no matter what emotions they feel. Show them how to love and accept themselves even when the anger seems big and scary, or the jealousy overwhelms them, or the fear seems to cover everything else. Let’s break the cycle of people who believe and preach that it’s bad and wrong to feel human emotions—and the people who, because of those beliefs and preaching, believe that *they* are bad and wrong.